Our ragtag group of adventures marched, walked, and poorly sneaked to the nameless part of town where they found the Creepy Old House. As ominous as it was a poorly constructed cliche of a building, the adventurers were fairly sure whatever was causing the disappearances lied within. Just why the good people of Portsmith couldn’t come to the same conclusion remains to be seen. Perhaps if the town guards actually did some investigating of the disappearances rather than just posting a note on “Ye Ole Cragslist” the town would be a safer place to live.
So Grombo decides to kick the front door down. He kicked a hole in the door. He backed up and ran full speed into the door and bounced off. Ilyana then walked up and opened the unlocked door.
It was unfortunate for her that she didn’t realize that at that moment Grumbo had decided to run full speed at the door with his giant hammer.
If you are keeping score at home: Door 2, Grumbo 0. Grumbo 1, Ilyana FUBAR!
Ilyana was knocked unconscious by a hammer to the face. Alice healed her back to health.
Meanwhile, a very confused Vengi investigated, leaving him very much more confused. He had thought they might be trouble and he would have to destroy them, but they seemed to be destroying themselves.
He closed the door at the top of the stairs, an action noticed by some of the adventurers. Grombo climbed to the top of the stairs and went to open the door. He slipped and fell backwards down the stairs. Angered at the stairs, those who would not hug him, and perhaps whoever had psychologically given him the need to be constantly hugging, he began bashing the stairs with his hammer, destroying the old rotting stairs.
After he cooled down, he attempted to pull himself up on the rotting stairs, but his weight crushed the stairs instantly. He then grabbed his smaller companions and set them on top of the stairs. They used rope, strength, and a lot of hope to pull Grombo to the top.
At the top of the stairs and through the door they met Vengi. Grombo apologized for treating his house like whack-a-mole, and Vengi said “Blah blah blah I’m totally not a bad guy can you read a book for me?” And everyone laughed because Grombo can’t read.
But the group was willing to try to read the creepy old guy’s book, but that meant going back down the chasm that used to be stairs.
Once the entire group made it down the stairs in a series of clumsy events, the Benny Hill music stopped playing and Vengi was ready to have his book read to him. Iyana geared up to read the creepy old man his bedtime story but found the book to be full of horrible dark things, written in a language she does not understand, and was bound in human flesh.
It was also at this time we learned that Grobo’s sense of smell rivals his abilities to negotiate doorways and stairs. The book smelled delicious to him and he wanted to eat it.
It was also at this time the adventurers noticed the blood dripping from the ceiling.
It was also at this time that Vengi decided that this group of morons was hardly helpful, and had in fact destroyed his house, so perhaps he should just kill them already. And that is when the innocent creepy old man that lives in an ominous house full of macabre knickknacks turned out not to be innocent at all, but a Were-rat. he transformed into a rat and got ready to kill.
Unfortunately for Vengi he slipped on the dripping blood, fell on his face, and the group proceeded to collectively beat him like a…well like a giant rat.
Sadly no one really knew Vengi, well not so much sadly, he was a pretty horrible person. All the same, there was more to his life than just were-ratting and cannibalizing. For instance, he was really into writing poetry, and was, particularly, a master of the heroic couplet. In fact, his last thought as he perished in such a strange way was:
“They came in bashing, catching me unawares.
Now I am as alive as I have stairs.”